I'm filled with nervous anticipation as my fingers brush over the keys. Instead of swift, confident keystrokes, I strike down on the pad with hesitant uncertainty. Doubt clouds my feeble mind! I quickly backspace over the two words I had just carefully crafted. They weren't eloquent enough, damnit! Beads of sweat form on my brow. I phone my family psychiatrist for an emergency session, which quickly devolves into weeping.
Am I working on my resume? Am I applying for a new job? Am I writing a wedding toast?
No, this is something else. The pressure is far more intense. This is my first album review on iTunes. A while ago, I went to a club in Clarendon called Iota and saw an artist perform there. Her name was Bess Rogers, and I thought she was amazing. Our eyes connected over the crowd as she whispered (just for me, I'm sure) "Mic check. Check, check. Can you hear me?"
Yes, Bess. I hear you.
That was last month, but I just now found the note that I made on my iPhone to buy her album, "Travel Back". And since Nic gave me an iTunes gift card for my birthday, I thought I would put it to good use. Normally, I would just pirate her album, but Bess is such a small-time artist, that I can't even steal her music. Well played, Bess.
Anyways, I was such a fan of the album, I decided to write a glowing review and submit it to iTunes. It took me about an hour. Seriously. But behold the review that I have written (I doubt a poet could even produce better):
Conn-Rating: 4 stars
Conn-Title: Worth Every Cent
Conn-Description: "Travel Back" is short, but sweet with great upbeat songs. I saw Bess Rogers live and immediately made a mental note to buy this album. "Everything to Lose" is my favorite, but each song has great merit!
Connor's Daily Grind: Fresh-Brewed and Delivered Right to Your Doorstep
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