I had my Boeing "new hire" orientation today. Being a social butterfly, I immediately got acquainted with the young people at my table. There's me, Sean, a girl named Sammy, and another girl named Meghan (who will work in the same group as me). I was excited, because I'm trying very hard to establish a new set of friends that you might find on a sitcom. Classic shows like Seinfeld or Friends always have a balance of men and women.
Sean: Hey, we should all meet up tonight and get drinks.
Sammy: Yeah, that sounds like fun!
Me: Count me in.
(Sammy stands up and leans forward to collect her papers. I accidentally do a quick boob stare, which I typically try very hard to avoid. I look down abruptly as Sammy catches my gaze at the last second.)
Internal Monologue: Oh shit! She just saw you staring at her chest. Wait... calm down. Maybe she didn't. Is she glaring?
(Quick glance upwards. Sammy is glaring. Glance away again.)
Internal Monologue: She DID see me! I gotta salvage this or else I'm going to lose my new friends. Say something to break the tension!! QUICKLY!!!
Connor: Nice set of cannons, Sammy.
(Collective gasps at the table.)
Internal Monologue: Nice recovery.
Connor's Daily Grind: Fresh-Brewed and Delivered Right to Your Doorstep
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